Donna became my legal guardian when I was 11 years old. I'm 22 now and she still treats me the same way but worse as I get older. I've been a target of humiliation for as long as I can remember. I stutter and because of that I believe she thinks I'm stupid. She is a very large red haired women who has continued to terrify and embarrass me since I was sent to live with her. From the very beginning I had no privacy since both the bathroom and my bedroom door had no lock. She frequently came in the bathroom as I showered and also while using the toilet. She never hesitated to spank me many times for trivial things I did. At first she only pulled my pants down but by the time I was 12 or so she made me undress spanking me naked. She often made me undress in front of her cousin Clare who is over 50 as Donna is. The ultimate embarrassment came when I was about 15 or 16 when her niece Dawn who is 30ish now saw Donna spanking me naked. I was and still am forced to get an enema 4 times a year and no matter how young I was when it started its even more humiliating now. I am sure Donna does these things to me to intentionally embarrass me. Dawn has never seen me getting an enema but Clare has many times which only makes it worse. My only relief of Donna was when I was in school and now only when I work at the supermarket. I have never had sex although I do masturbate and that also was brought on by Donna with a suggestion by Clare. I think I was about 15 and I did get erections sometimes but never really jerked of enough to cum. It was a Saturday afternoon when Donna was giving me an enema that Clare was watching and suggested that Donna should shave around my anus and also my pubic hair. I have dark chest hair and did have lots of pubic hair at the time. Donna didn't shave me that day of the enema but a few nights later came into the bathroom as I showered, Once out of the shower She sat on the toilet and made me stand there as she first cut my pubic hair with scissors then shaved me in front of Clare. As if that wasn't bad enough she also made me turn and bend over holding my butt cheeks apart and shaved around my anus and all along the crack of my butt. There was only a few more times I ever cried after that night but I still put up with all this humiliation yet today. She would put shave cream on my genitals and actually hold my penis as she shaved my scrotum. It wasn't until many months went by that one night Without thinking about it I got an erection. Again Clare had to be there and I was more embarrassed than aroused. Donna just looked at me as she and Clare laughed. Donna stood up then with the shave cream still on me and basically ordered me to masturbate. I began jerking off in front of them and don't know how I held back tears. I know it took a long time but it was the first time I ever ejaculated. Donna began asking me how often I masturbate and when I denied doing it she only smiled at me. From that night on I masturbate in front of them every week when Donna shaves me and over the last few years they have actually let Dawn be there. Donna doesn't spank me often but when she does I am always made to completely undress and has allowed Clare to spank me many times. Dawn is here sometimes but she has never spanked me. Even though I am not spanked to often it is more severe than when I was young. They not only use a belt but the last few years Danna has began using a hair brush which really hurts. As much as I hate the spankings it is much more humiliating when I get an enema. That's even worse than when she shaves me and makes me jerk off. I do like jerking off when I'm alone but it still embarrasses me when they are watching me and it always take me a long time to cum. At least I don't cry while doing it anymore knowing how they are laughing at me.

Last month by coincidence I was introduced to Maria who as it turns out I spent 4 years with in an orphanage in Peru from 1977 until 1981. I'm 52 now and Maria is 53 and we have become close friends once again. In 1977 I was sent to that place at 12 years old. The girls and boys were in 2 separate buildings and although the school itself was fine the memories of those years are still haunting me today along with Maria. There were well over 200 boys and girls there but very little interaction between the two. As Maria and I began to talk about our experiences most of the conversation was about Dr. Vesa and Dr. Ortiz and neither of us know if that was their names anymore, but close. We don't even know what kind of doctors they were, if they were doctors, but do remember how we were abused by them continually for the four years I spent there and the five years for Maria. Finally in 1981 the orphanage was shut down and In 1982 My grandmother got me to America and I now live in Pennsylvania. Maria and I along with I can't imagine how many other girls were subjected to humiliating examinations at least once a month and often every three weeks. We were spanked at times and in general had little privacy between these two men. There was never any kind of schedule for these exams, we would simply be told to report to Dr. Vesa that day usually in the evenings after dinner hour. Most of the time both of them were there and we were told to remove all our cloths and given a white wrap that covered us from under our arms to our knees with only one button at the top. Each time we were fully examined by the two on an examination table and the wrap taken away leaving us naked . Within the first two months my hymen was penetrated and at the time I didn't even understand what virginity was,. Each time these exams lasted up to a full hour and we were subjected to them even when we had our minstrel periods. Aside from the humiliation sometimes the exams were painful, especially the first year of them when they used speculums and began penetrating us annually. Even more humiliating when I think about it now is how they would intentionally bring us to orgasm. The phrase " let yourself go" was something they would say frequently and as embarrassing it was to be exposed naked in front of them I do remember the sensations of orgasm and often several times during the same exam. The more I developed the more intense the exams became as one of them fondled my breasts claiming examination the other would be examining my vagina causing my arousal. What I went through is identical to what Maria experienced and she was there almost a year longer. I wasn't spanked often over those years compared to many of the other girls but the spanking was also humiliating since our skirt was pulled up and panties removed. I never really spoke to many people about this and tried not to think about it. Maria and I talk about it fairly often now and it makes me angry now instead of the embarrassing part of discussing it. I have told my husband of some of what went on but have never told him how often they were able to have me orgasm during the exams . I still have not told him about that part of it and probably never will since it still makes me feel to much humiliation that they were able to do that to me and probably many other girls. I'm glad I am friends with Maria once again and talking to her about those years puts my mind more at ease. Even though its 40 years ago it is a traumatic time of my life that I wish not to think about.